Auto Pilot

Sometimes during all of the crisis I feel triumphant and ready to conquer the day. Other times I feel numb and emotionless like a robot just putting one foot in front of the other, and still at other times I feel as though If I cry I might never stop. But I just stuff it all and be strong and carry on. I do it for the girls, for Kevin, for gramp Gary, and for myself. It's only after all the dust settles and Kevin comes home that I am able to break down, usually in the shower, so noone can hear me.